Overthinking used to be my second nature. Every decision, every situation, was an invitation to dive deep into a sea of endless thoughts and “what ifs”.
This habit didn’t just exhaust me mentally, it also held me back from making swift, effective decisions.
But everything changed when I stumbled upon an 8-step method that finally quieted my mind.
This method isn’t just about silencing your thoughts, it’s about giving you the tools to think clearly and make decisions with confidence.
Let me share this journey with you, and show you how to leave overthinking behind for good.
1) Acknowledging the issue
Overthinking is a tricky habit. It’s often disguised as thoroughness, attention to detail, or just a deep-thinking nature.
But here’s the thing: there’s a world of difference between being thoughtful and getting stuck in an endless cycle of over-analyzing every single thing.
The first step I took was acknowledging that I was an overthinker.
I realized that my habit of overthinking was not just a harmless trait. It was a roadblock, standing in the way of quick, effective decision-making and causing unnecessary stress.
Admitting this to myself was difficult, but it was also liberating. It meant that I wasn’t doomed to be an overthinker for the rest of my life. I had identified the problem, and now I could start working on a solution.
You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge. So take a moment to ask yourself if you’re guilty of overthinking. If the answer is yes, then congratulations! You’ve taken your first step towards a quieter mind.
2) Embracing mindfulness
I’ll be honest: when I first heard about mindfulness, I was skeptical. It sounded like one of those buzzwords that get thrown around without anyone really understanding what it means.
But as I delved into the concept, I realized that mindfulness is simply about being present in the moment – and it turned out to be a game-changer for me.
I used to find myself staying awake at night, my mind racing with thoughts about what happened during the day and what challenges tomorrow might bring.
Then, I tried incorporating mindfulness into my routine. Every night before bed, I would take a few minutes to just sit quietly and focus on my breathing. If a thought popped into my head, instead of following it down the rabbit hole, I would simply acknowledge it and bring my focus back to my breath.
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This simple practice helped me break the cycle of overthinking. It didn’t happen overnight, but gradually, I noticed that I was spending less time dwelling on things that were out of my control and more time enjoying the present moment.
Mindfulness might not be for everyone. But if you’re an overthinker like I was, it’s definitely worth a try.
3) Setting aside worry time
It might sound counter-intuitive, but dedicating a specific time slot for worrying can actually help reduce overthinking. This technique is commonly used in cognitive behavioral therapy.
Here’s how it works: instead of letting worrisome thoughts invade your mind throughout the day, you schedule a specific time to address them. During this “worry time”, you allow yourself to think about whatever is bothering you.
Outside of this time slot, whenever a worrying thought pops up, you tell yourself: “Not now, I’ll think about this during my worry time”.
This method helps you regain control over your thoughts. It shows your mind that you’re in charge, and it can’t just throw worrisome thoughts at you whenever it wants.
Over time, you might find that many of the issues that seemed so pressing at the moment aren’t quite as important when it’s finally their turn to be addressed during your ‘worry time’.
4) Practicing detachment
One of the core teachings of Buddhism is the concept of detachment. Detachment doesn’t mean not caring about anything. Rather, it’s about not letting your happiness be dependent on external circumstances.
In my journey to stop overthinking, practicing detachment played a crucial role. It taught me to let go of my need to control everything and accept things as they are.
By practicing detachment, you can learn to accept reality without over-analyzing or stressing over outcomes that are beyond your control.
This doesn’t mean that you stop planning for the future or neglecting your responsibilities. Instead, it allows you to make decisions without the crippling fear of making a wrong move.
Buddhism teaches us that life is a constant flow of change, and by accepting this fact, we can free our minds from the chains of overthinking.
5) Learning to trust myself
There was a time when every decision felt like a monumental task. Picking a restaurant, deciding on a weekend activity, even choosing what to wear – I would agonize over the smallest choices, terrified of making the ‘wrong’ decision.
I realized that at the heart of my overthinking was a lack of trust in myself. I was scared of making mistakes, of disappointing others, or myself.
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So, I decided to work on building my self-trust. I started with small decisions, like choosing what to eat for dinner without second-guessing my choice. Gradually, I moved onto bigger decisions.
I won’t lie – it wasn’t easy. There were times when I stumbled, made mistakes. But each mistake was also a learning opportunity, a chance to grow and understand myself better.
Over time, trusting myself became easier. And as my self-trust grew, my tendency to overthink decreased. It was liberating to finally trust in my ability to make sound decisions.
6) Saying yes to overthinking
It sounds strange, doesn’t it? After all, the goal is to stop overthinking, so why would I say yes to it?
Here’s the thing: resistance often exacerbates the problem. The more you try to fight or suppress your thoughts, the more they persist.
So instead of trying to push away my overthinking, I started to accept it. I allowed myself to overthink but with a twist – I observed my thoughts without judgment.
This was not about giving free rein to my overthinking. It was about acknowledging its presence without letting it take control.
By doing so, I was able to create a mental distance between myself and my thoughts. I could see them for what they were – just thoughts, not absolute truths.
This shift in perspective was a turning point for me. It took away the power that overthinking had over me and helped me regain control of my mind.
7) Establishing a bedtime routine
Sleep and overthinking often have a love-hate relationship. An overactive mind can rob you of a good night’s sleep, and in turn, lack of sleep can fuel more overthinking. It’s a vicious cycle that I was all too familiar with.
So, I decided to establish a bedtime routine to break this cycle.
My routine was simple. I would wind down an hour before bed, stay away from screens, and instead read a book or listen to calming music.
This routine acted as a signal to my brain that it was time to slow down and prepare for sleep.
Gradually, my mind started associating bedtime with relaxation instead of a time to mull over the day’s events or worry about tomorrow.
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Establishing a bedtime routine might seem like a small change, but it was effective in reducing my night-time overthinking and improving the quality of my sleep.
8) Practicing self-compassion
Overthinking often comes hand in hand with self-criticism. We berate ourselves for past mistakes, worry about future failures, and create a narrative that’s far from kind.
But the truth is, we’re all human. We all make mistakes, and that’s okay.
So, instead of beating myself up over every perceived misstep, I started practicing self-compassion.
I would remind myself that it’s okay to make mistakes, that it’s okay to not have all the answers.
This didn’t just reduce my overthinking, it also helped me build a healthier relationship with myself.
Being kind to yourself is not a luxury, but a necessity. Because at the end of the day, you’re all you’ve got. Practice self-compassion – you deserve it.
Conclusion
Overcoming overthinking isn’t about reaching a state where you never overthink again. It’s about learning to manage your thoughts effectively so they don’t rule your life.
Remember, this is a journey, not a destination. There will be days when you’ll find yourself falling back into old patterns of overthinking. And that’s okay. What matters is that you recognize it and gently steer yourself back on track.
Ultimately, remember that your thoughts are just thoughts. They don’t define you. They don’t control you.
You have the power to choose how much importance to give them.
Overcoming overthinking is about reclaiming that power and learning to trust in yourself and your ability to handle whatever life throws at you.
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