Have you ever caught yourself wishing life would be more extraordinary — like scoring that perfect dream job or achieving some rare talent that leaves everyone else in awe?
I used to think that being average meant missing out on a richer, more exciting existence.
But the more I’ve explored what genuinely makes people happy, the more I’ve come to see that being “ordinary” can actually be the secret to a more contented life.
In many ways, I’ve lived a fairly everyday life: went to university, worked in a community nonprofit, then shifted into freelance writing.
I used to wrestle with the idea that my path wasn’t “glamorous” enough.
I felt a pressure — sometimes subtle, sometimes loud — to stand out or do something remarkable.
Yet as I listened to people’s stories and researched what truly sustains a sense of well-being, I realized that the steady, everyday moments we often overlook can be our greatest source of joy.
The myth of exceptionalism
We live in a world that prizes the outstanding, the record-breaking, or the once-in-a-lifetime accomplishments.
Everywhere you turn — social media, TV shows, even ads — someone’s telling you to “stand out from the crowd.”
While ambition can be fantastic, it’s easy to slip into thinking that a conventional life is somehow lesser.
Yet, research shows a different story.
According to empirical studies, many of the happiest individuals don’t necessarily possess extraordinary achievements.
They’re often people who find satisfaction in daily routines and maintain healthy outlooks without constantly chasing the next big milestone.
That was eye-opening for me.
I’d spent years pushing myself to shine in every possible area—work, fitness, even trying to be the “perfect” friend. Along the way, I overlooked the smaller joys that actually made life feel rich and textured.
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Sometimes, the greatest serenity comes from the ordinary rhythms that anchor our lives, rather than from standout feats or glamorous experiences.
Why “average” can feel so comfortable
One thing I’ve noticed is that ordinary doesn’t have to be boring.
It’s routine that gives us stability, whether it’s our morning coffee ritual, a weekly catch-up with a sibling, or the simple pleasure of reading a book before bed.
When you don’t carry the constant burden of “being exceptional,” there’s more space for peace of mind.
An article from the Journal of Consumer Research highlights that people who are constantly striving to stand out can become trapped in cycles of anxiety and dissatisfaction.
It’s like chasing a moving target you can never quite catch.
Sure, it can be exhilarating to win an award or receive wide recognition, but the high often fades quickly, leaving you craving the next accolade.
In my own life, I saw that wave of excitement when I hit certain “milestones.” I’d think, “Finally! I’ve achieved something!” only to feel the rush slip away.
Then I was back to feeling incomplete unless I reached another big goal.
But the research I came across showed that focusing on everyday pleasures—like sharing a laugh with a friend—correlates more consistently with long-term happiness.
It shifted my perspective.
Rather than always looking for the next trophy, I began looking for magic in daily life: noticing the warmth of sunlight through the window, relishing the satisfaction of ticking off tasks without needing them to be record-breaking.
Ironically, letting go of the need to be special created more room for genuine contentment.
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The science behind ordinary joy
You might wonder, “Is there actual evidence that average equals happier?”
One massive study published in Nature Communications Psychology involved participants across 7 countries who received $10,000. The aim of this study was to explore how happy they’d feel about different types of purchases made with that money.
The findings were extraordinary:
Everyday moments could spark more happiness than money. They didn’t require life-altering events — just genuine presence in the here and now.
This experiment confirmed something I’ve been feeling for a while: we’re more likely to be satisfied when we appreciate life’s small delights, rather than constantly comparing ourselves to others or trying to “get ahead.”
Little steps—like a brief text conversation or a hot cup of tea after a tiring day—can be surprisingly powerful mood boosters.
It’s not about rejecting all ambition.
It’s about realizing that constantly pushing for greatness can overshadow the steady glow of contentment that ordinary life offers.
As someone who loves exploring new hobbies and challenges, I still find excitement in growth. But I also know I’m happier when those pursuits aren’t tied to proving my worth or outdoing others.
Freeing your mind from limiting beliefs
For me, the biggest hurdle in embracing my “average” moments was my own mindset. I was locked into beliefs that if I wasn’t accomplishing something extraordinary, I was wasting my potential.
This led to burnout, stress, and even resentment toward people who seemed to be doing less yet appearing just as happy—if not happier!
A turning point came when I stumbled upon shaman Rudá Iandê’s Free Your Mind masterclass.
In one of the exercises, I confronted the idea that success equals worthiness, a belief that had been ingrained in me for years. The course inspired me to question why I tied my sense of self to constant achievement.
By peeling back that layer, I saw how much fulfillment I was missing by overlooking ordinary joys.
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I’m not suggesting that a masterclass is the universal key for everyone. But it was the wake-up call I needed to break free from that all-or-nothing mentality.
Learning to release the pressure of “must excel at everything” made space for real, everyday happiness. It was a relief — like stepping off a never-ending treadmill and finally being able to breathe.
How to embrace an “average” life on your wwn terms
If, like me, you’ve ever felt the need to dazzle the world, you might ask: “What does leaning into an ordinary life even look like?”
In my experience, it’s about small, intentional shifts in perspective.
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Celebrate small wins: Got through your to-do list? That’s a win. Cooked a decent meal? Another win. Recognizing these moments adds up, creating a sense of daily accomplishment.
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Practice mindful gratitude: Rather than thinking, “It’s just dinner,” try appreciating the entire moment—preparing the food, sharing it with someone, or simply enjoying it alone in peace.
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Avoid the comparison trap: We hear this advice all the time, but it’s crucial. Comparing your everyday life to someone’s highlight reel on social media is almost always going to lead to dissatisfaction.
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Stay curious: Embracing the average doesn’t mean you stop learning or growing. I keep trying new recipes, exploring new yoga classes, and reading books outside my comfort zone. The difference is, I’m not pushing to become the “best” at any of them; I’m doing it because the process itself is fun.
These simple practices have shifted my day-to-day outlook. I’ve found that the more I recognize the charm in what I once labeled as “ordinary,” the more fulfilling each day becomes.
Finding balance in goals and contentment
Some people worry that if they embrace an average life, they’ll lose motivation.
I had the same worry: “Won’t I become complacent?”
But trust me, it’s not about ditching goals altogether. It’s about balancing ambition with genuine self-acceptance.
When you combine healthy aspirations with an appreciation for daily life, you create a more sustainable form of happiness.
It’s like walking a middle path between unattainable perfection and stagnation.
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You can still aim for personal milestones—a promotion, a new creative skill, or a fitness goal—while acknowledging that you’re okay as you are right now.
Conclusion
From the outside, “ordinary” can look dull compared to the glitter of being the best or having a groundbreaking achievement.
But the deeper I dive into the research — and the more I live my own everyday moments—the clearer it becomes: being average is not a flaw.
It’s a space where genuine, lasting contentment often resides. That doesn’t mean you should never dream big or reach beyond your comfort zone.
Dreaming is part of being human, and challenging ourselves can lead to self-discovery.
Yet the notion that life must be extraordinary to be fulfilling is simply untrue.
We can find so much beauty in the mundane details that shape our days—like sipping coffee in the morning sunshine or sharing a joke with a friend.
No confetti cannons or red carpets are necessary to make life feel worthwhile.
Sometimes, the highlight reel you see online can distort the quiet joys that actually enrich our existence.
If anything, celebrating our “averageness” might be one of the bravest acts in a world obsessed with standing out.
It’s a reminder that we are enough, right here, in our everyday routines and simple pleasures.
And from my experience, once you embrace that, happiness often comes rushing in with open arms.
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