In a world that constantly demands excellence, perfection, and endless optimization, Oliver Burkeman offers a refreshingly contrary perspective.
What if embracing our imperfections is actually the key to living a fuller, more meaningful life?
Welcome to the liberating philosophy of “imperfectionism” – not a call to mediocrity, but rather a radical acceptance of our inherent limitations as the foundation for a more engaged existence.
We’ve all been there – paralyzed by the pursuit of the perfect moment, the perfect plan, or the perfect version of ourselves. We delay starting businesses, writing books, having difficult conversations, or making important changes because conditions aren’t “just right.” Meanwhile, life passes by.
The truth is startlingly simple: perfection is an illusion that keeps us trapped in planning mode rather than living mode.
Burkeman argues that our finite time on Earth isn’t something to deny or fight against, but rather the very constraint that gives our choices meaning. When we accept that we can’t do everything, be everything, or control everything, we gain the freedom to focus on what genuinely matters.
Consider this perspective shift: What if your limitations aren’t obstacles to overcome but the very boundaries that define a meaningful life?
1. Embrace your human bandwidth
Understanding that you have limits isn’t depressing – it’s liberating. You have finite time, energy, and attention. You cannot do it all. Once you internalize this truth, you can stop spreading yourself thin across endless possibilities and instead direct your precious resources toward what truly enlarges your life.
This isn’t about lowering your standards. It’s about recognizing that trying to excel at everything guarantees excellence at nothing. The most successful people don’t do more; they do less, but with greater focus and intention.
2. The power of messy progress
“Done is better than perfect” isn’t just a catchy phrase – it’s a fundamental truth about how progress actually happens. The most significant barrier between you and your goals isn’t lack of knowledge or resources but the paralysis that comes from waiting for perfect conditions.
Start the project with inadequate information. Have the conversation before you’ve rehearsed every possible response. Launch the business before all uncertainties are resolved. Small, concrete, imperfect steps will take you further than perfect plans that never materialize.
3. Why challenges are your greatest assets
The fantasy that we can somehow arrange our lives to be problem-free is perhaps the most damaging form of perfectionism. Every meaningful pursuit comes with challenges. The solution isn’t to eliminate all problems but to choose which problems are worth having.
A life without problems isn’t a perfect life – it’s an empty one. The question isn’t “How can I eliminate all difficulties?” but rather “Which difficulties are worth embracing as part of a meaningful journey?”
4. The art of not rescuing everyone
Our perfectionist tendencies often extend to those we care about. We can’t bear to see them struggle, so we rush in to fix everything. But in doing so, we often rob them of their own growth opportunities and burden ourselves unnecessarily.
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Supporting others doesn’t mean solving everything for them. Sometimes, the most caring approach is to resist the urge to rescue, allowing people the dignity of working through their own challenges while offering presence rather than solutions.
Embracing imperfection isn’t just a philosophical position – it’s a practical approach to living. Here are tangible ways to incorporate “imperfectionism” into your daily life:
5. Adopt “daily-ish” habits
I love this term. The all-or-nothing approach to habit formation sets most people up for failure. Missing one day on a “daily” habit often leads to abandoning the practice entirely because the perfect streak is broken.
Instead, aim for “daily-ish” practices – consistent but flexible. This approach acknowledges your humanity while still building momentum. Five imperfect workouts a week beat zero perfect ones.
6. Go decision hunting
When you feel stuck or overwhelmed, look for small decisions you can make right now. Often, the feeling of being trapped comes not from external circumstances but from avoiding choices.
Ask yourself: “What’s one small decision I could make right now that would move things forward?” Then make it, imperfectly and without guarantees.
7. Finish what you started
There’s unique energy that comes from completion. Perpetually unfinished projects drain us, while even imperfectly completed ones generate momentum and confidence.
Give yourself permission to finish things at “good enough” quality. A completed imperfect project provides more value than a perpetually polished work-in-progress that never sees the light of day.
8. Regularly ask “What matters?”
In a world of infinite options and distractions, this simple question becomes your north star. What truly enlarges your life? What diminishes it? Let these answers guide your choices about where to direct your limited time and attention.
This question cuts through the noise of “should” and connects you to what genuinely matters in your particular life with your particular values.
9. Let some things be easy
Not everything worthwhile needs to be difficult. We often have a strange resistance to approaches that seem too easy, as if suffering were a prerequisite for value.
Challenge the assumption that if something feels easy or enjoyable, it must not be important or effective. Sometimes the path of least resistance is actually the wisest choice.
10. Remember “C’est fait par du monde”
This French-Canadian expression roughly translates to “It’s made by people.” When faced with intimidating achievements or institutions, remind yourself that everything in this world – from great literature to successful companies to influential policies – was created by regular, flawed humans not fundamentally different from yourself.
This perspective dissolves the artificial barrier between “exceptional people” and the rest of us, making meaningful action more accessible.
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The paradox of imperfectionism
Here’s the fascinating paradox at the heart of imperfectionism: By abandoning the pursuit of perfection, you often achieve better results than you would have through perfectionism.
Why? Because perfectionism isn’t really about high standards – it’s about fear. Fear of judgment, fear of failure, fear of inadequacy. These fears keep us stuck in endless preparation, revision, and hesitation.
When you embrace imperfection, you break this paralysis. You take action, learn from results, adjust course, and keep moving. This iterative process typically produces far better outcomes than perpetual planning ever could.
More importantly, you actually live while doing so, fully engaged in the messy, imperfect reality of existence rather than postponing life until some imaginary perfect future arrives.
Embracing imperfection isn’t something you do once and complete. It’s an ongoing practice, a lens through which to view your choices and challenges.
Start small. Identify one area of your life where perfectionism has kept you stuck. Apply an imperfectionist approach – take one small, imperfect action today. Notice the freedom and momentum that comes from breaking the perfection paralysis.
Over time, this approach builds not just better results but a fuller experience of life itself. You’ll find yourself more present, more engaged, and paradoxically, often achieving more meaningful accomplishments than when you were trapped in perfectionist thinking.
In a culture obsessed with optimization and excellence, embracing your limitations might seem counterintuitive. But as Burkeman suggests, it’s precisely this acceptance that allows us to focus on what truly matters, take meaningful action, and engage more fully with the brief, precious life we’ve been given.
Perfect isn’t possible. But a rich, meaningful life – lived in full acknowledgment of your humanity – absolutely is.
