There’s a stark contrast between enjoying a sociable drink and becoming a mean drunk.
Psychology explains that when alcohol takes over, it can transform some people into mean-spirited versions of themselves. It’s not just about slurred speech or stumbling walks.
While everyone’s reaction to alcohol varies, those who become mean when they drink usually exhibit seven common behaviors.
Curious about what these signs might be? Keep reading as we delve into the world of psychology to uncover these telltale behaviors.
1) Aggression takes center stage
Psychology has always been intrigued by the transformational effects of alcohol, especially when it comes to aggression.
Those who become mean when they drink often have aggression as their primary behavior. Alcohol has a way of lowering inhibitions, leading to out-of-character actions. It can amplify existing personality traits, turning a usually calm person into someone with an aggressive disposition.
As renowned psychologist Sigmund Freud once said, “Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.”
This is particularly true for those who harbor unexpressed anger or resentment; alcohol can act as a trigger, bringing these emotions to the surface in a more aggressive manner.
It’s important to recognize this behavior when it emerges, both for the safety of the individual and those around them.
2) A complete personality shift
We often see people completely change when they’ve had a few too many, and I’ve experienced this personally too. A friend of mine, let’s call him Mark, was the epitome of kindness and generosity when sober.
But after a few drinks, he would become a completely different person – rude, belligerent, and hurtful.
This is not an uncommon occurrence. Alcohol can sometimes lead to a drastic personality shift, making people act in ways that are totally out of character. This is one of the key behaviors to look out for in people who become mean when they drink.
Psychologist Carl Jung once said, “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
In Mark’s case, alcohol wasn’t causing his mean behavior; it was merely revealing aspects of his personality that he kept hidden when sober. It’s a sobering thought and one that highlights the importance of understanding our actions and their root causes.
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3) Unpredictable mood swings
Ever been around someone whose mood swings wildly after a few drinks?
This is another common behavior displayed by those who become mean when they drink. One moment, they might be laughing and enjoying the party, the next they could be picking a fight or breaking down in tears.
These unpredictable mood swings can be distressing, not just for the person experiencing them, but for those around them too. It’s like walking on eggshells, never knowing what might set them off.
The famous psychologist Abraham Maslow once said, “What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.”
Being aware of these mood swings and understanding their potential impact is the first step towards change. It’s not easy, but it’s vital for personal growth and healthier relationships.
4) Lack of empathy and understanding
Mean drunks often display a lack of empathy and understanding towards others. They become self-centered, unable to comprehend the feelings and needs of those around them.
A study published in the journal ‘Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research’ found that heavy drinkers showed a significant lack of empathy towards others. They were less likely to understand the emotions of others, and this lack of comprehension often led to aggressive behavior.
This lack of empathy can make those around them feel unimportant and ignored, further escalating conflicts. Recognizing this behavior is crucial, as it is often a warning sign of potential harm to oneself or others.
5) Excessive criticism and blame
Nothing seems to be off-limits for those who become mean when they drink. They often resort to criticizing and blaming others excessively, even for trivial matters.
I remember attending a party where a slightly intoxicated guest started blaming his partner for all the problems in his life. It was uncomfortable, to say the least.
This kind of behavior can be damaging, leading to strained relationships and emotional turmoil.
The renowned psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.”
This quote is particularly relevant here. It’s essential to remember that while alcohol might catalyze these behaviors, it’s not responsible for them. The first step towards change is accepting responsibility and taking control of one’s actions.
6) False sense of superiority
It might be counterintuitive, but some people who become mean when they drink often exhibit a false sense of superiority. Despite their negative behavior, they believe they’re the most intelligent or capable person in the room.
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This inflated self-perception can lead to condescending attitudes and belittling comments towards others. It’s a defensive mechanism that masks deep-seated insecurities.
The eminent psychologist Alfred Adler once said, “The neurotic is nailed to the cross of his fiction.” In this case, the fiction is the perceived superiority.
Recognizing this false narrative is key to understanding the behavior of mean drunks and helping them seek appropriate help.
7) Inability to accept responsibility
Lastly, those who become mean when they drink often refuse to accept responsibility for their actions. They may blame the alcohol, other people, or external circumstances for their behavior.
Renowned psychologist B.F. Skinner once said, “The environment shapes people’s actions.” Despite this, it’s critical to understand that we also have control over our actions and reactions.
Avoiding responsibility is a damaging behavior, one that only perpetuates a cycle of negativity and harm.
Final thoughts
Understanding human behavior, especially under the influence of alcohol, is a complex web of psychology and biochemistry. The seven behaviors we’ve discussed are common in people who become mean when they drink.
These behaviors are not just harmful to the individual but also to those around them. They strain relationships, create discomfort, and can even lead to violence.
Recognizing these behaviors is the first step towards change. It’s about breaking the cycle, taking responsibility, and seeking help when needed.
While alcohol might catalyze these behaviors, it’s not responsible for them. The person in question is. Understanding this can help us empathize with mean drunks instead of just avoiding them.
Next time you’re in the company of someone who becomes mean when they drink, remember these behaviors.
Not to judge or criticize, but to understand and potentially help.
Remember, we’re all a product of our actions and reactions. And with understanding, comes change.
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