Love can be a complex maze, but one thing is clear- actions speak louder than words.
In relationships, what they do (or don’t do) can reveal more about their feelings than any sweet nothings whispered in your ear.
Let’s delve into these love no-nos as a kind of relationship litmus test.
Are you ready to uncover the truth about your relationship?
Through this journey, remember this: knowing the truth, however harsh it might be, is better than living in illusion.
After all, clarity is the stepping stone to making better decisions – and that’s applicable to all aspects of life, not just relationships.
1) They put their needs first
Love is a two-way street. It’s about compromise, understanding, and mutual respect.
But what if you find yourself in a relationship where your partner’s needs, desires, and aspirations always take center stage?
According to relationship therapists, this could be a red flag.
A person who truly loves you wouldn’t consistently prioritize their own needs over yours.
They would understand that your needs are just as important and valid as theirs.
It’s not about keeping score, but about creating a balance where both parties feel valued and heard.
Love isn’t just about the grand gestures and romantic moments.
It’s also about the small, everyday acts of consideration that show how much you matter to them.
If you find that your partner consistently puts their needs first without considering yours, it might be time for a serious conversation.
Get Smarter Everyday Join Us On WhatsApp
2) They dismiss your feelings
Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship.
It’s how we express our needs, our desires, and yes, even our frustrations.
I remember a time when I was dealing with some personal issues. Work was stressful, and it was taking a toll on my mood.
I tried expressing how I felt to my partner expecting empathy or at least a comforting word.
Instead, my feelings were brushed off as being ‘overly dramatic’ or ‘unnecessary’.
It made me feel unheard and dismissed. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling.
Relationship therapists agree: someone who truly loves you would never dismiss your feelings.
They would listen, empathize, and try to understand – even if they don’t necessarily agree with you.
Your feelings are valid. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.
If your partner often dismisses your feelings or makes you feel like they are unimportant, it may be an indication that they don’t truly love you the way you deserve to be loved.
3) They keep secrets
In a relationship, trust is as essential as love. And one of the quickest ways to erode trust is to keep secrets.
Couples who reported higher levels of secrecy also reported lower levels of relationship satisfaction.
This makes sense, right? Secrets create an invisible wall between you and your partner.
It feels like there’s a part of them that you’re not allowed to know, and this can lead to feelings of insecurity and suspicion.
Get Smarter Everyday Join Us On WhatsApp
A person who truly loves you wouldn’t keep secrets from you.
They would understand that honesty, even when it’s hard, is crucial for maintaining a healthy relationship.
If you find that your partner is keeping secrets from you, whether big or small, it might be time to reassess your relationship.
4) They avoid resolving conflicts
Every relationship has its share of conflicts. It’s part of being two unique individuals with different perspectives and experiences.
However, if your partner consistently avoids dealing with these conflicts or simply dismisses them altogether, that’s a problem.
Someone who truly loves you will understand the importance of resolving conflicts, not sweeping them under the rug.
They would be willing to engage in difficult conversations and work towards a solution, instead of avoiding them.
Avoiding conflicts doesn’t make them disappear. On the contrary, it allows them to fester and grow into bigger issues.
A healthy relationship requires open communication and a willingness to address and resolve conflicts.
If your partner often avoids resolving conflicts, it might be a sign that they aren’t as invested in the relationship as you are.
5) They belittle your achievements
Life is full of little victories. It could be anything – a promotion at work, finally nailing that tricky yoga pose, or even something as simple as finishing a challenging book.
I remember when I ran my first marathon. I was ecstatic. It felt like a huge accomplishment.
But when I shared my excitement with my partner at the time, their response was lukewarm at best.
Get Smarter Everyday Join Us On WhatsApp
They downplayed it, saying it wasn’t a ‘big deal’. Instead of sharing my joy, they made me feel small.
Someone who truly loves you would celebrate your achievements with you – big or small.
They would be genuinely happy for you and wouldn’t belittle your accomplishments.
After all, love is about uplifting each other, not bringing each other down.
If your partner can’t share in your joy and belittles your achievements, it might be a sign that their love isn’t genuine.
6) They don’t respect your boundaries
Boundaries are crucial in any relationship. They help maintain respect and understanding between partners.
If your partner frequently crosses or disregards your boundaries, it’s a clear sign of disrespect.
A person who truly loves you would respect your boundaries and understand their importance.
Whether it’s about your personal space, your need for alone time, or even how you choose to spend your free time – your boundaries should be respected, not dismissed.
Love isn’t about ownership or control. It’s about mutual respect and understanding.
If your partner can’t respect your boundaries, it might be time to reconsider the relationship.
7) They’re emotionally abusive
This is the most important point. Emotional abuse is never okay. It’s not a sign of love; it’s a sign of control and manipulation.
A person who truly loves you would never insult you, belittle you, or make you feel worthless.
They wouldn’t make you question your worth or your sanity.
Get Smarter Everyday Join Us On WhatsApp
Emotional abuse can be subtle and insidious. It can chip away at your self-esteem, leaving you feeling small and insignificant.
But remember, it’s not your fault, and it’s definitely not a reflection of your worth.
If you’re in a relationship where you’re being emotionally abused, it’s crucial to seek help.
Reach out to trusted friends, family, or a professional therapist. You deserve love that uplifts you, not one that tears you down.
Final thoughts: Love is about respect
When it comes to love, there’s one universal truth that relationship therapists agree on: genuine love is rooted in respect.
Respect for your feelings, your needs, your achievements, and most importantly, for you as a person.
If these elements are missing, it might be time to reassess the relationship you are in.
Love should never make you feel small or insignificant.
It should uplift you, make you feel valued, and encourage you to be the best version of yourself.
Yes, relationships can be complicated.
They require effort, understanding, and compromise. But one thing they should never require is the sacrifice of your self-worth.
Reflect on these points and ask yourself: Am I being loved the way I deserve? If not, remember that it’s okay to choose yourself.
After all, self-love is the first step towards any form of genuine love.
If you found this blog post insightful be sure to share it with those out there that are still not aware of it Don't forget to FOLLOW US on Facebook and hit the LIKE button for more new content. Thanks so much for reading.....
