Have you ever noticed how some people can’t go five minutes without bringing up their job title? Or how their mood swings depend on whether they got a promotion or some fancy new role at work?
While finding meaning in your profession is totally normal (and desirable), there’s a difference between loving what you do and making it your entire identity.
As historian and author Yuval Noah Harari once observed, “Humans think in stories, and we try to make sense of the world by telling stories.” Unfortunately, if someone’s only story is their job, they’re limiting the broader narrative of who they truly are.
Today, we dive into five behaviors that surface when people completely hinge their self-value on a job title.
1. They won’t stop bragging about their “achievements”
Let me tell you a quick story. I used to know a guy—let’s call him Kevin—who spent entire conversations talking about the big deals he was closing, the long hours he was working, and the oh-so-luxurious business trips he got to go on.
If you tried to change the topic, he’d find a way to boomerang it back to his workplace triumphs. It was like listening to a never-ending highlight reel.
Now, there’s nothing wrong with being proud of our hard work. We pour time and energy into it—so naturally, we want people to notice. But when someone’s self-worth is laser-focused on career success, they’ll often overcompensate by forcing their accomplishments into every discussion.
2. They measure everyone (including themselves) by titles and salaries
I went to a friend’s wedding a few weeks back and while all in all it was a lovely time, there was this one guest who—within five seconds of meeting you—would hit you with the question.
Not your name. Not where you were from. No, it was: “So, what do you do?”
Now, I get it. Small talk happens. But there’s a difference between polite curiosity and someone scanning your LinkedIn profile in real-time to size you up.
This person’s entire vibe screamed, “If your title isn’t impressive or your job doesn’t sound high-powered, you’re not worth my time.” You could practically see him ranking people in their head based on earning potential. He was in finance, of course.
He reminded me of that ‘brain surgeon’ scene from the classic British show, That Mitchell and Webb Look. If you want a laugh, you can check it out here – it’s pretty funny.
The problem here? When one’s identity is glued to their job, they start projecting that same value system onto everyone else. They stop seeing people as multifaceted humans—with interests, talents, and stories—and start seeing others as walking résumés.
3. They can’t switch off from work—ever
“This is the real secret of life—to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. Instead of calling it work, realize it is play.” That’s a quote from Alan Watts, and I’ve come to appreciate its wisdom deeply.
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Still, there’s a twist: some people have a hard time distinguishing genuine passion from a borderline obsession that covers up personal insecurities. When work becomes your entire identity, stepping away feels like stepping away from your sense of self.
Ever tried to have dinner with someone who’s glued to their phone, responding to work emails or micro-managing colleagues over Slack? It’s exhausting. They might justify it as dedication, but there’s a huge difference between commitment and a desperate need to stay relevant in the eyes of their boss or coworkers.
If you’re proud of your job but can’t relax for even a day without feeling “useless,” you might be tying too much of your self-image to career productivity.
I’ve had to catch myself doing this, especially during busy seasons. Walking away from the laptop when a big project is looming was once a struggle, but you realize you’ll burn out fast if you never allow yourself a mental break.
Trust me—when you’re more than just your job, stepping away becomes easier.
4. They look down on “simple pleasures” or non-work achievements
I’ve mentioned this before, but I went through a phase in my career journey where I equated “success” with hustle and high-level professional moves. I’d internally scoff at people who took time for hobbies that didn’t directly feed into a resume—like painting watercolors or perfecting a sourdough bread recipe. It seemed trivial to me at the time.
I took me a while to realize that I was robbing myself of the joy and balance that comes from having interests outside of my job. Experts backs this up, too. As the folks at WebMD have noted “Studies have also shown that individuals that regularly take time off for their hobbies are less likely to feel low or depressed. In fact, such activities can make you happier and more relaxed.”
It might be subtle but people who base their value on their career often roll their eyes at anything that doesn’t boost their professional image. They might dismiss a neighbor’s side gig of creating handmade jewelry or question why someone would go fishing on weekends “when they could be using that time to get ahead.”
5. They experience an identity crisis when they’re not progressing at work
Last but not least, let’s talk about what happens when the promotions stop, the praise dries up, or—worst-case scenario—someone gets laid off.
When a person’s entire sense of self is wrapped up in their job, any disruption at work doesn’t just feel disappointing—it feels personal. Like a direct hit to their worth.
It’s not uncommon to see someone who’s spent years chasing the next rung on the ladder suddenly hit a period of stagnation, and it completely unravels them. They don’t just question their career—they start questioning who they are without the title, the accolades, or the momentum.
The reality is, every career has its ups and downs. Sometimes a person is climbing. Sometimes they’re coasting. And sometimes they’re forced to pivot or pause. That’s just the natural rhythm of working life.
However, when a person sees themselves as more than a job title, those slow seasons don’t break them. They might feel humbling—but they don’t feel like the end of the story.
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Because at the end of the day, a job is just one chapter in someone’s larger narrative. A fulfilling life is made up of many roles—friend, artist, traveler, caregiver, thinker—and the more a person invests in those, the steadier they’ll be no matter where their professional journey goes.
Rounding things off
If any of this hits close to home, you’re not alone. It’s easy to let work take the wheel, especially in a culture that rewards hustle and titles.
But real fulfillment comes from building a life that’s rich beyond the resume. The more space a person makes for identity outside of their job, the more grounded—and honestly, the more human—they become.
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