Ghosting and gaslighting: two tactics used in relationships, often leaving a trail of emotional distress. They’re more than just terms you hear in pop culture; they have real consequences.
Ghosting is when someone vanishes without a trace, leaving you questioning where you stand. Gaslighting, on the other hand, is a form of manipulation where someone makes you doubt your own reality.
The psychological impacts of these actions? They can be profound. And it’s about time we shed some light on them.
In this article, we’ll delve into eight psychological impacts of ghosting and gaslighting. You might just find the answers you’ve been looking for.
1) Self-doubt
Ghosting and gaslighting are forms of psychological manipulation that can cause serious self-doubt.
Imagine you’re in a relationship, and everything seems to be going well. Then, out of the blue, the person disappears. No calls, no texts, no explanation. This is ghosting.
The sudden disappearance can leave you questioning everything. Did you do something wrong? Could you have prevented it?
Gaslighting is no less damaging. It’s when someone manipulates you into doubting your own perceptions and memories. They may insist that something didn’t happen when it did, or vice versa.
How does this impact you? It can make you question your own judgment and lose trust in yourself. This self-doubt can be debilitating and affect other areas of your life as well.
But remember, the issue lies with the person who is ghosting or gaslighting, not with you.
2) Anxiety
Ghosting and gaslighting can lead to anxiety, a feeling I know all too well.
I remember dating someone who would disappear for days, only to reappear as if nothing happened. The constant uncertainty of not knowing when they would vanish next was nerve-wracking.
Then there was the gaslighting. They would twist events, making me question my own memory. “You’re overreacting,” they’d say, or “That never happened.” This constant questioning of my reality was like living in a fog of confusion.
The result? Anxiety. I was constantly on edge, wondering when the other shoe would drop. It felt like walking on eggshells, never quite sure of where I stood or what was real.
This is just one example of how ghosting and gaslighting can trigger anxiety. It’s a psychological impact that’s all too common but rarely talked about openly.
3) Depression
Ghosting and gaslighting can significantly contribute to feelings of depression. When you’re left without closure or made to question your own reality, it’s natural to feel low.
According to a study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, people who have experienced ghosting reported higher levels of depression than those who haven’t. The abrupt end without explanation can trigger feelings of worthlessness and sadness.
Similarly, gaslighting can lead to depression. It undermines your confidence and self-esteem, leaving you feeling helpless and hopeless – classic symptoms of depression.
It’s important to recognize these signs and seek help if needed. No one should have to navigate these feelings alone.
4) Relationship distrust
Experiencing ghosting or gaslighting can create a lasting impact on how you perceive future relationships. It’s like a shadow that looms over every new connection, casting doubt and fear.
After being ghosted, you might find yourself waiting for the other shoe to drop. You might become overly cautious, always on the lookout for signs that history might repeat itself.
With gaslighting, it’s worse. You’ve been made to doubt your own reality, your own experiences. This can create a deep-seated fear of trusting anyone again. After all, if someone you cared for could manipulate your reality, who’s to say it won’t happen again?
This distrust can make it difficult to form genuine connections in the future. It’s a lingering impact of ghosting and gaslighting that takes time and effort to overcome.
5) Loss of self-esteem
Imagine being made to feel like you’re not worth an explanation or a proper goodbye. That’s the cruel reality of ghosting. It can leave you feeling unworthy and unimportant.
And then there’s gaslighting. It’s a manipulative tactic that can lead you to question your own thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Over time, this can chip away at your self-esteem, making you feel like you can’t trust your own judgment.
The damage to self-esteem from these actions isn’t just momentary; it can last long after the relationship has ended. It’s not uncommon to find yourself questioning your worth in new relationships or situations because of these past experiences.
But remember, the way someone treats you does not define your worth. Your value does not decrease based on someone’s inability to see it.
6) Emotional exhaustion
Ghosting and gaslighting can drain you emotionally, something I experienced first-hand.
In one relationship, I was ghosted repeatedly. Each time, I’d agonize over what went wrong, only to have them reappear as if nothing happened. The cycle was exhausting.
Then there was the gaslighting. Having to constantly defend my recollection of events was like fighting a losing battle. It felt like I was living in a whirlwind of confusion and self-doubt.
The result? Emotional exhaustion. It felt like my emotions were a well that had run dry. Even after the relationship ended, it took time to recover and regain my emotional strength.
This is just one way that ghosting and gaslighting can take a toll on your mental health. It’s important to recognize these signs and take steps to protect your emotional well-being.
7) Fear of abandonment
Ghosting can instill a deep-seated fear of abandonment. When someone you care about disappears without a trace, it can leave you with a constant worry that it could happen again.
This fear can affect future relationships. You might find yourself holding back, afraid to fully invest emotionally, in case they decide to disappear too.
Similarly, gaslighting can exacerbate this fear. The constant manipulation and deceit create an unstable environment, making you feel like the rug could be pulled out from under you at any moment.
This fear of abandonment is a real and significant psychological impact of ghosting and gaslighting. Recognizing it is the first step towards overcoming it.
8) Post-traumatic stress symptoms
Experiencing ghosting and gaslighting can be so distressing that it leads to symptoms similar to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
These can include intrusive thoughts or memories of the incidents, feeling on edge, and avoiding situations that remind you of the person or relationship.
It’s a heavy burden to carry and one that deserves attention. If you recognize these symptoms in yourself, it’s important to seek professional help. These experiences are not just ‘bad breakups’; they can have serious, lasting impacts on your mental health.
Final thoughts: It’s not about you
Experiencing ghosting and gaslighting can be a deeply distressing experience, leaving psychological impacts that can last long after the relationship has ended.
It’s important to remember that these behaviors reflect more on the person doing them than on you. The decision to ghost or gaslight is not a measure of your worth or value.
You are not alone in these experiences. Many people have walked this path before you, and there is help available. Whether it’s talking to a trusted friend, seeking therapy, or joining a support group, there are resources available to help you navigate these feelings.
Remember: It’s okay to feel what you’re feeling. It’s okay to take time to heal. And it’s okay to seek help if you need it.
Ghosting and gaslighting can leave scars, but they don’t have to define you. You are more than these experiences. You are resilient, and with time and support, you can heal and grow from these experiences.
